Peace.

Unbelievable sights
Indescribable feeling
Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling
Through an endless diamond sky
I'm like a shooting star, I've come so far I can't go back to where I used to be.

It's funny how a cartoon movie can so accurately explain what I spent hours trying to put into words.
It's poignant, this new phase of life.
The working, the laughing, the work.
For the first time I feel as if I'm working hard and yet it hardly seems like work at all.
Yeah. It's a strange feeling to actually have moments in a day when I'm at peace with myself, hanging out with people I actually get on board very well with.
The past few years seem to fade fast. Those were good, yes.
But this is quite different.
Quite different and frankly it's terrific.

Peace: I couldn't understand why people use it so much all the time when signing off. Maybe because I've never really been satisfied before. Ironically, never been rapaciously satiated as I am now.

It's one homegenous mixture. And I love being a part of it.

It's a culture. It's life.

It's what I want.

And it's what I've always needed.

Peace.

Blank.

"Tell me what it's like
To be the last one standing
And teach me wrong from right
And I'll show you what I can be
And say it for me
Say it to me
I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth savin' me..."

Everyone comes to a stage in their lives of a distorted sense of disconnect.
Like we're watching our own lives through a window in a glass tower.

It's not an unpleasant feeling, but it's not great.

Emotions are in turmoil and mood swings are sudden as they are violent.

Everyday I wake up with the awareness of a big black cloud somewhere in the sky, except that I don’t know when the hell it’s going to rain and make way for clear skies and some sunshine.

I hate uncertainty.

It’s one of the main reasons I’m so afraid of the dark. I can never know what’s lurking behind that shroud of black, and that scares me.

Not knowing things frightens me.

So ideally I should be deathly scared right now.

And yet again I’m not. Apprehensive, yes. Indignant – very much so.

Scared? No, not really.

Life is such a puzzle.

[Confessions of a twisted mind: And you thought you’d seen everything.]